Bathroom passes are notorious for being weird and clunky, perhaps even awkward to carry to the bathroom with you. They also are oftentimes creatively made by teachers, either reflecting puns, relating to their classroom content, or are just straight humorous. If you’ve ever had to use the restroom during class at Inspire, you’ve surely been met with a strange menagerie of items labeled as passes to be carried to the bathroom with you. This week, we will be ranking our top 5 favorite Inspire bathroom passes.

5. 

   Isern’s Maracas

In order to go to the bathroom during one of Isern’s spanish classes, you must take one of these maracas with you. These are wonderfully creative and fun, being relevant to his classes and carrying a little bit of whimsy with them. Maybe on your way to the restroom you’ll shake a beat on these. However, some students feel a little weird using them, because they have a handle that is unable to be hung on a hook, knowing that someone else might have touched the maracas again before washing their hands.

4. Gunderson’s Whiteboard

Upon the wall of IC-21 hangs a whiteboard with “Potty Pass” written on it. Although it lacks fun colors or an alternative function, it does what it was meant to and doesn’t leave a lot to be desired about its functionality. It sports a handle on top that allows it to be hung or placed in any baskets or hooks in the restroom, so you can thoroughly wash your hands before having to pick it back up again.

3. Jarrah’s Wrench

   

In Jarrah’s classroom by the door hangs the IC-11 bathroom pass; a wrench with a duct tape label. It has a string attached to one end, which makes it ideal to carry to the bathroom with you, and not awkward to lug around. It also holds the use of being able to fix any leaky faucet you may come across, a huge bonus for Inspire bathrooms.

2. Peek’s Poop

In Peek’s class, in order to use the restroom you must take with you a pile of rubber dog poop, intended for practical jokes, attached to a lanyard. Although many freshman taking physics are mortified to carry an actual pile of fake poop to the bathroom, as you spend more years at Inspire and get to know Mr. Peek, you’ll find it to be on the dot for his personality, and quite funny. The lanyard also adds practicality points, which lands it the number 2 spot in our list.

1. No Hall Pass

   

Despite all the wonderful contenders, nothing quite beats no hall pass at all. Not only is it far more sanitary without having to trust that other students have washed their hands thoroughly, but it prevents other students from not being able to use the restroom due to a lost hall pass. Some may argue that hall passes help prevent students from ditching class, but a determined student will simply lose the pass in the bathroom before ditching, to be found later by a custodian or another student. Although you miss out on the fun of a quirky hall pass, having nothing to forget in the bathroom or worry about the sanitization of is definitely the best. 

With all bathroom passes, please remember to keep them sanitary and not leave them in the bathroom, wash your hands thoroughly before returning to class, and keep the bathrooms in a good condition and not leave a mess. If not out of respect for other students using it, out of respect for yourself (yuck!).